My Vase Full of Weeds

When I logged in to write this “super quick” blog post I realized it had been ONE entire YEAR since my last blog post! And- how ironic- that last blog post was about our contemplation on whether or not to have one more child- our fourth. We have actually since then had TWO more children, for a grand total of five. How, you ask? We were “blessed” blessed with TWINS! My husband and I often asked one another how our lives could possibly get any more chaotic. God laughed and then answered.

As you can (or CAN’T) imagine, our lives have been so full in so many ways since we found out and since having those precious babies on New Year’s Day. I’m currently at a stand-off with this laundry for seven in my living room:

As I’m getting ready to tackle it, my 4 year-old daughter asks to go outside. I oblige and a few minutes into my sorting, folding, and hanging, go check on her. She is knee-deep in our yard near the field picking dandelions. For me. As she does nearly every. single. day.

I sigh and think, How do I break it to her that dandelions are weeds and I could do without them? 

I don’t have time to dig under our sink for a vase; I don’t have room on our kitchen table that already dubs as a desk for three and clutter-catcher for seven; I don’t want to look at them and smell them and have them cause me stress. Then I realize: she thinks they are beautiful. They are her favorite. And she is choosing to pick them. For ME. Why do I have to crush her excitement by telling her they are weeds? Why do I have to make her feel bad by telling her that I don’t want them? Nope. I won’t. When I see that vase full of weeds on my kitchen counter, I will remember that my precious daughter, who gets scolded and put-off by me daily due to the babies’ needs and my stress, still chooses to pick flowers for me- and these days will soon pass.

So we talk about how beautiful those bright yellow flowers are and we put them in a vase together. And there they sit, amidst cereal bowls from I’m not sure which day.

It then dawned on me that this is something worth writing about. Just last week I started a Bible Study with a group of ladies from church on “The Best Yes: Making Wise Decisions in the Midst of Endless Demands” by Lysa Terkeurst, and one of the things I’ve always regretted saying “no” to was writing. I vowed to carve out a little bit of time each week to write in one way or another. It may not sound like a Best Yes to you given that picture of laundry above. (Go ahead, scroll back up there; I’ll wait.) Honestly, I’m kind of second-guessing it a little myself. But it felt right. It felt necessary.

So here we are. She’s happy; I’m happy and my house is still a mess. But isn’t that better than the alternative? It is for me. It is during this season of our lives. So each time I look at that vase full of weeds, it will represent so much: my daughter’s innocent heart and giving spirit, my wise decision to keep that innocence intact and spend those quality moments of time with her, and my “Best Yes” to put the laundry off a little longer to document this moment and this feeling. For the days are long but the years are short. This season will soon be over. And, who knows, when my kids are no longer picking flowers for me, I may find myself out in my yard picking dandelions just so I can look at a vase full of weeds on my kitchen table again.